Think About It

I never thought I'd be pursuing a career that would lead to such inner turmoil and conflict. I feel like I am being told/taught one thing and living another. Don't get me wrong - the MAT program is great, but I'm having a tough time translating the things I'm learning in class to the actual classroom. Granted, I'm only a student teacher, but I can't even get kids to quiet down when I ask them politely. One of my favorite students told me I smile too much and that's why the other students aren't afraid of me. I don't want to instill fear, just respect.

I was raised by two parents who taught me to respect my elders. Apparently this isn't something that parents nowdays are teaching their children. This is what frustrates me to no end. The program emphasizes that "we teach who we are" which sounds great in theory, but practically, we teach a bunch of kids who are disrespectful. And then we make excuses for them like the kids are the problem. Oh, sure Tommy has a rough home life and yes, Suzy was adopted, but Tommy and Suzy aren't the problem. Their parents are.

I don't understand people that choose to have kids and then don't do everything in their power to provide them with love, safety, opportunity, etc. If you're too selfish to take care of children, don't have them. There's this great thing called abstinence. Maybe you should try it sometime instead of bringing more children into the world who will be victims of abuse, hunger, etc. because you're too self-absorbed to see that your children are taken care of. I just don't get it. If abstinence isn't for you, try birth control. Lots of it.

It's not fair that so many children have to suffer because of their ignorant parents. It's not fair that teachers get blamed for kids being bad kids when teachers are just trying to do their job.

Inspiration on Aisle Two

A brief encounter in the tea aisle of the grocery store left me challenged and inspired. I have to give a passion presentation in one of my classes this week. I have five minutes to share something I am passionate about. My guitar, more importantly, music, is my passion of choice. Being that I'm bringing my guitar - and sharing about how much I have always loved music - chances are someone will want to hear me play and/or sing. This terrifies me. I can sing at church, with a microphone, in front of dozens of people. But sing and play in front of my cohort? Terrifying. Plus I don't have a powerhouse voice; I'm never going to be a diva. When I get nervous, I don't sing very loud. In my head, this sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. In my heart, I want to sing at the top of my lungs.

I found myself sharing this with someone who attends the same church I do - in the middle of the grocery store. He reminded me that "it's about the passion, not the performance." We need to be faithful in the small things, so that God can use us to accomplish even greater things. While in the bigger picture, this may be a small, small event, in my life, it could prove to be monumental. I believe that God gave me the gift of worship. I believe that because of Him, I am able to play the guitar. I believe that He gave me a voice so I could worship Him and share His amazing love with the world. What good is a gift if you don't use it? What good is a light if you hide it under a bushel?